Dreams vs Reality

I am occasionally caught in between my dreams of what I think my life can be and the reality of what I see when I look in the mirror. It is tempting to slide into the abyss of hopelessness that one feels when what they hoped for is not manifesting itself- no matter how much sweat and intellectual exercise has been expended. I believe in the power of mantras to help me create my life. Some people call such words affirmations or prayers. Really all a mantra is, is a circle of words repeated over and over. The tricky thing about a mantra is that it can be a positive thing or a negative thing. Used in a positive way, mantras can help one stay in the moment and listen to the Spirit calling and guiding one's life. Used in a negative way, a self denegrating phrase repeated over and over again can become one's reality.

"A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight,

and his punishment is that he sees the dawn

before the rest of the world."

--Ocsar Wilde

"Isn't it the moment of most profound doubt that gives birth to new certainties? Perhaps hopelessness is the very soil that nourishes human hope, perhaps one could never find sense in life without first experiencing its absurdity."

--Vaclav Havel

The People You Surround Yourself With

CAUTION !   CONTROVERSIAL TOPIC !

I am blessed to have many friends and even more friendly aquaintances.

In most cases, the people I consider my friends have been designated as such because they value the same things I do and have proven, over time, to be dependable. They are dependable as mirrors and as models of a sort. They are dependable in conversation, they are dependable as companions in the activities of life, they ask great questions, they are listeners, and they have the ability to support me without feeling the need to pander to my every whim. They are their own person. I like that kind of friend. The number of people I consider a true friend is actually small considering all the people I know. After all, how many BFFs can one person really have?


There have been a few times in my life when I have unfriended people...and that was way before Face Book!
I have intentionally chosen not to hang out with certain people because I realized, after a while, they were not the kind of human being I wanted to spend time with. That sounds harsh, yes. But I do think that there are times when we allow a person into the inner circle saved for friends and then come to find out that they were not what we thought they were. Maybe their personality and ours just don't jive or maybe we both have not grown in the same ways and now it is time to part ways. Just like seasons in nature, there are seasons in relationships. When we realize this we can either continue to pretend that they have what we need in a friend or we can find a compassionate way to distance ourselves and remove their influence from our life.


I like Face Book as much as any fan out there. FB helps me to stay in touch with all my friendlies. But...in a way, Face Book has ruined the word and even the concept of "Friend." Friendship is so much more than a FB status update and a running total of pictures of faces and icons. Recently a quote has been making the rounds on Face Book: "You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with." I don't know who that quote is attributed to but if it is true, don't you think we need to pay close attention to the people we surround ourselves with the most? I'm just sayin'.

Life's Messiness

"I like someone who is a little crazy

but coming from a good place.

I think scars are sexy because it means

you made a mistake that led to a mess."

--Angelina Jolie

"When we talk about settling the world's problems,
we're barking up the wrong tree.
The world is perfect. It's a mess.
It has always been a mess.
We're not going to change it.
Our job is to straighten out our own lives."
--Joseph Campbell